


Assorted Heroes Drabbles

by Lgbarnecraft



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes
Genre: All Aboard, Alternate Universe - Western, Angst, Crackships ahoy, Drabbles, Gay, God I love Alfonse, Hilarity Ensues, M/M, Memes, More tags to be added, Online piracy, Pining, Romance, Stargazing, Summoner has internet access, Summoner is a huge nerd, Summoner knows about FE, Trigger warning: Rickroll, You won’t believe how many people are mad about rickroll so it’s a tw now, the rating might go up, umad?, youve been warned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-04-20 16:50:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 5,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14265417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lgbarnecraft/pseuds/Lgbarnecraft
Summary: Another drabbles series because I can’t write a coherent full story to save my life. These are mostly starring this Askr's summoner, Luka, in which he's in over his head, head over heels for a certain prince, and extremely glad his Secure Shell Server back home still works. Yeah a lot of shitposting here.





	1. SUPERHOT EMBLEM

Luka stares at the screen of the one thing he brought with him to the realm of Zenith, his trusty laptop. His Summoner's robes discarded in favor of something simpler. He had the day off since Muspell's forces didn’t seem to have their number, there’d be no battle today, perfect time to hole up in his tent, connect to his server back home, and catch up on some video games, what else to do when you don’t have to do your job?

Only now, he’d finished a rather short indie title, and it encouraged him to recommend it to his friends. So at the crack of dawn the next day...

“Hey Alfonse, have you played this game? I’ve never seen anything like it.” He asks the prince, who gives him a rather puzzled look.

“If it’s another one of your strategy games, I’m out, I’m not looking to lose to you again...” He sighs, currently on a 35 game losing streak of chess.

“No no no, you don’t understand, you gotta play it, it’s not a game you play against me, but I can’t say too much, or it won’t be as fun. Just launch this file!” Luka says rather hurriedly, shit eating grin all over his face. Alfonse knew it had to be some kind of Earth-realm joke, he had a weird appreciation for Luka's strange humor, that doesn’t mean he understood it.

Nonetheless, Alfonse takes the flash drive and laptop off Luka's hands for a few hours, he knew the basics on how to use this thing after watching Luka use it so often. “I’ll play it when we stop marching for a moment, it can’t be worse than playing chess against you or Anna...”

Luka beams. “Okay, great! You’re gonna enjoy this game, I played it over and over last night.” He says with another stifled laugh, scurrying off and leaving Alfonse to wonder what the hell he's getting himself into.

A few days later, Anna pokes her head into Luka's tent, calling for him with a slight tone of fury. He gulps, shutting his laptop down and facing her. 

“Luka, we’ve got traitors in our group.” She says. Luka shakes his head.

“Huh? No way, why would anyone side with Surtr? You’re kidding me right?”

“I’ve no clue, but Alfonse, Sharena, and most of the army has been chanting SUPER-HOT, SUPER-HOT over and over during training! If it’s not signs that they’re siding with the enemy, it’s at least extremely annoying! You wouldn’t happen to know why, would you?” 

Luka sighs. “That’s er... A funny story...” He gets a sly smirk on his face. “Say, commander? Have you played this rad game? Heh. It’s the most innovative shooter I’ve played in years.”

“Huh...?” Anna asks. “Whatever, just fix this if it’s your fault.” She mutters, leaving him. 

Luka takes another deep sigh, was he proud of himself? Hell yes. “God I love video games.” He speaks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alfonse listens to The System.


	2. Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Growing old is getting old  
> I often find myself here thinking  
> About the birds, the boats, and past loves that flew away or started sinking  
> And it's crazy here without you  
> I used to think this all was ours  
> We'd stay up late, debate on how we'd find our way  
> Say it's all up in the stars“  
> -Stars, Fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn’t even a Drabble, just a straight up oneshot. I love Alfie so much.

“I never took you for an animal person, Alfie.” Luka teases him with his pet name, earning a sarcastic scoff. “I’ve dealt with my fair share of cats 'n dogs but the one time I went horseback riding I fell and earned myself a black eye and bruised up face.”

“I’m not proficient in horseback combat, but I’ve plenty of experience riding. I told you I’d take you stargazing, didn’t I?” Alfonse holds his hand out to the shorter boy. “Climb up, she won’t throw us, I promise.” He swears, with a smile Luka cannot say no to. 

He tosses any small fears he had aside and takes Alfonse's hand.

They’d promised to do this, Luka desperately wanted to experience more of the world as if he actually lived here, rather than be an outsider from a more “advanced” world. Though, he’s not sure the Askran prince knows that a nighttime ride to a starry field was seen as romantic. Zenith sure as hell was no downtown. But it was fine, the simpler life was alright.

“We aren’t even at a trot, you don’t have to hold onto me like your life depends on it.” He says, snapping Luka out of his thoughts.

“Ah, yeah, I-I see.”

They make merry small talk, mostly about their lives outside this war. Alfonse mostly wondering about life in the Summoner's home realm. 

“We're pretty far along, thing is, most everything's been discovered already, and most feuds between nations are settled.” Luka elaborates.

“That sounds much more preferable than this world, I hope you can help us achieve that.” Alfonse muses. Luka shakes his head.

“Don’t be so sure,” He shifts a little to sit up in the saddle, “War never went anywhere, it’s just changed. We’ve come a long way from poking sticks and magic at eachother, now everyone's got weapons that can wipe entire populations out at the touch of a button. But most large nations have them, so rather than fight wars, it’s a pressure game. The people just have to hope one nation doesn’t overstep their bounds. It’s a web of alliances, if one country gets blown, it’s all going down.” He sighs.

Alfonse is quiet for awhile after that, speaking up when they reach the middle of the field clearing. “Frightening to think about, that you could die at the single error of your leader, and barely even know it... But at least the simple things still exist, right?” He looks over his shoulder, Luka didn’t quite enjoy the fact that sitting behind him on his horse meant he couldn’t see his eyes unless Alfonse looked over at him. “There are still stars. Nobody can steal away the sky.”

Luka had to wonder if the more medieval culture just bred poetic responses like that naturally. Sometimes he found Alfonse's chivalrous nature (“Disney Prince” he liked to call him) cheesy but for the most part, his charisma had its intended effect.

The topic then shifted away from wars and towards the stars.

“There’s a constellation back at my home called Orien, it looks like a guy with a bow, some people call it The Hunter.” The summoner explains. They’d dismounted, lounging on the grass. Trying to piece together which stars were which, it was harder for Alfonse to figure it out since they were much further from Askr now.

“There.” He points to a nebula to his right. “Do you see the shape of that group?” 

Luka stares for a solid minute, mind configuring the stars in a multitude of patterns to try and discern what exactly it was. Eventually, the stars had defeated him. “Er... A gorilla wearing a tie?”

Alfonse can’t help but snicker at that. “It’s a sword, see?” He draws out the shape with his finger in front of Luka's vision. “Specifically... It’s Fólkvangr. The generations before mine originally forged this sword in the image of this constellation.” 

“That’s interesting.”

“Very nice indeed.”

“Nah, not nice, interesting.”

Alfonse looks over, surprised. “Whatever do you mean?”

“In my world, things get made for people to use as they like, not the other way around.” The summoner muses. Alfonse was still looking quite confused. “People weren’t made to inherit things, they were made to invent things. At least, that’s how I view life.”

“I... See, sort of. Are you saying I should give it up in favor of something else?”

“No, that wasn’t disappointment, that was advice. I think you should use Fólkvangr to carve your own path, you’re doing a good job so far, but if your birthright determines who you are, you’re an extension of that birthright, not a being.” Luka shakes his head again at Alfonse's bemused expression. “Sorry, philosophies of mine can be strange. I’ve had a lot of time to think. You don't really gotta understand it.”

“I’m not sure I want to... But it's good to know you care, besides, I like hearing the strange things your world has. Other realms are about as advanced as our own, yours is on another echelon.” Alfonse turns back to the stars. There’s more silence. Until... “...When you said I was doing a good job so far, Luka, what did you mean?”

“All those nobles? Your own father? They didn’t want you fighting here, and you’re doing it anyway. You refused to let that sword remain a trophy. I think that’s pretty cool... Defying expectations is so much harder where I’m from, what when everything's already nearly been done.”

The prince looks him dead in the eyes and utters words that once again forces Luka to evaluate whether this stargazing trio was meant to be romantic, of course it isn’t, they’ve not explicitly stated love for eachother, Luka was too embarrassed, besides, a prince needs to bear a child, for Alfonse and him to be together would be more trouble than it’s worth. But there were those words that made Luka blush in the dark. 

“You’ve defied all of mine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cheesy romance and philosophically pondering whether Zenith is any better than this world. Alfonse doesn’t need a bunny suit to go horseback riding.
> 
> #SaveAHorseRideAlfonse


	3. Ｆóｌｋｖａｎｇｒ　ト案乙 A E S T H E T I C

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alfonse learns to see music in a whole new way, and Luka can’t dance for shit.

“This is music?” The prince asks, lifting the headphones connected to Luka's laptop off his ears. His face looks as if unsure if he’s been enlightened or traumatized. “I’ve never heard instruments like these, and the vocals are eerie, is this popular in your realm?”

Luka wags his finger, ready to correct. “It’s only popular ironically, it’s less of actual music and more of a statement envisioning a futuristic world of complete consumerism where emotion is cheap. In other words, it’s an A E S T H E T I C.” He laughs. “As for what makes it, in my realm, computers like this laptop can make music that normal instruments can’t make, and it can even edit existing sounds to make them entirely new. Most of this track is a pitched and slowed down song about someone waiting for another to confess love, waiting for them to make a move rather than confessing herself.”

“Summoner, forgive me, but I really don’t follow, what’s the point of music that tries to sound offputting?” Alfonse was clueless. 

“Alfie, close your eyes and listen to this.”

“What song will you choose?”

“You’ll see.”

He shrugs and does as told, The summoner quickly types into the YouTube search bar.

What soon fills Alfonse's ears is something much more familiar, small orchestral accompaniment, slow sounds that moved like waves.

“What do you imagine when you hear this?” Luka asks him.

“...A ballroom, with people dancing, that’s what this type of music was made for.” He responds.

“But why? It’s just sound, how can it take you to a place?” The question is rhetorical, and Alfonse lights up, seeming to understand. “Music can take us lots of places through sense. I think the reason Music like what we previously heard is important, I told you we’ve explored most of our world, the only thing left is to envision outcomes that could’ve been through art, such as music.”

“That’s incredible! I’ve never thought of it that way...”

They spend the next few minutes listening to all manner of modern music, Luka explaining the aesthetics and meanings of several genres. (And can’t help but chuckle at how much Alfonse seems to silently enjoy classic rock)

By looping through YouTube suggestions, they eventually make it back to the song that they’d begun listening to. Suddenly, Alfonse unplugs the earbuds from the laptop.

“Huh?” Luka looks up, Alfonse is standing, holding his hand out. 

And so, they end up dancing for a short comical moment, to an eerie slowed down and chopped up Diana Ross track, until the summoner steps on the prince's feet, they decide that’s it on vaporwave dance lessons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> King Gustav would later ask aloud at dinner: “My son, what in the gods' names is “Vaporwave”?”


	4. NO COPYRIGHT LAW IN THE UNIVERSE IS GONNA STOP ME!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka doesn’t have acceptable online currency in Askr, he makes do anyway.

Anna squints. “So you didn’t even buy any of these games since you got here?”

“Do I look like I got dollars? Steam doesn’t accept gold pieces.” Luka mutters, continuing to play his pirated copy of XCOM 2.

Alfonse perks up. “That’s still morally dubious, don’t you think so?”

Their beloved summoner pauses, turns in his chair, and gives a blunt look.

“The anti-piracy police can’t catch me here, I think I’ll reap as many rewards as that can get me.” Anna scoffs and walks out in disappointment. “I’ll pay them back in gold pieces when I get home again, promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT CONDONE PIRATING GAMES (unless the devs are scumbags)


	5. Spam Mail

“Luka, we need to talk about this.”

“Talk about what, Alfie?”

“Don’t “Alfie” me, summoner!” 

Well, that was new. “What’s got you so worked up?”

“You’ve been passive aggressively harassing my father...” Alfonse responds, face bewildered. Luka rolls his eyes.

“How do you know it was me? Your dad's gotta have a lotta enemies in court, I could care so much less about him.”

“Luka, he received 20 letters from different bards requesting him to change our national anthem to “Cheeki Breeki Extreme Hardbass.” The handwriting all matches yours.”

“It’s a banger, despite the memes.” 

Alfonse scoffs. “I can’t believe you... I spent an hour bailing you out! Just... Why?”

The air between them becomes extremely tense. 

Why? That was a very loaded question. Luka was a very honest person, except when he wasn’t. “He had it coming, unfiltered mail was made to be spammed.” 

The prince just sighs, settling, the summoner rejoices to himself at that.

“Never again, it was quite embarrassing...” He whispers, leaving Luka's quarters.

What Luka couldn’t tell him was that this was all a petty way of venting his disdain for King Gustav's prior treatment of Alfonse.

———

The following evening, King Gustav of Askr came to his office, happy to find it wasn’t swamped with forged letters. Only one. They must’ve caught the dastard that did it. He sits in his chair, gently peeling the letter open, the seal was from the Order Of Heroes, he didn’t agree with that group, but it seemed important. He looked it over with a stoic expression.

Dear Lord Gustav  
Never gonna give you up  
Never gonna let you down  
Never gonna run around and desert you  
Never gonna make you cry  
Never gonna say goodbye  
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

PS: Have you played this game called SUPERHOT yet? It's a one of a kind experience. ;)

The king crushed the letter in his hands, tossing it into his wastebin, which was filled with plenty of other letters of the same cheekiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnTW6fZz-1E
> 
> This will be the last time I make the SUPERHOT joke. Farewell, sweet meme.


	6. Sunset

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alfonse is the hero of a particularly arduous battle.
> 
> He isn’t as satisfied as he thought he would be.

Alfonse had a greater manner of blood on his attire than he’d usually accrue from the battlefield. It was a particularly tough fight, he’d decided to head the front lines, someone has to, and he was tired of not stepping up to the challenge. But in the end, it was a crushing defeat for Muspell’s army, the prince standing on the balcony of the now seized fort, looking out to the sunset.

He hated how much he had to kill, but that was only after he’d killed so many, before the battle, he would’ve told anyone he was happy to serve and do anything for his army and for his people, and that’s not a lie, but things change after the fact, he knows it’s likely he will return to that old view again, and again, and again.

As he stares out, something grasps his shoulder, he’s already got his hand on his blade, ready to turn and throw his attacker off balance, then stab, then kill, routine for the day.

He curses himself for even having the thought of doing that when he realizes it’s only Luka, not an enemy. He relaxes and smiles, halfheartedly, at his trusted friend. 

“You did amazing.” Luka tells him.

“Come now, it wasn’t that... heroic...”

“You saved my life, Alfonse.”

“I did...?” He doesn’t even remember it, he was just downing foes one after the next, anything to win.

“Yes... You did.” The summoner breathes. “I... I know you’re broken up, Alfie, it’ll be okay, we’re ending this faster than expected...” Alfonse gives him a look of disbelief, Luka nods. “I’ve never had to kill anyone, but you have your reasons, otherwise you wouldn’t be alive now.”

“That d-doesn’t make it okay all the time... Muspell’s army must be filled with many who are fighting against their wills... They don’t want to die, and I’m killing them!” He chokes out, the tears are nearly there, the dread subsides a little when Luka pulls him into a tight hug.

“I know... I know... Please don’t be hard on yourself, you’re doing what you have to, not what you want to, I can at least relate to that...” He whispers.

Alfonse is content with the answer, hanging on the words, it’s all he can do. 

They unwrap their arms from eachother, opting for silence in the setting sun. The prince realizes his scarf has been soaked in blood, it can’t possibly be washed.

He tosses it to the wind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uR2Eva_lROs  
> I wrote this to the song above, which ironically plays to a similar scene, I thought this was funny enough to mention. This is pretty angsty tho, please console your Alfies when they need it.


	7. Pirate’s Punishment.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka gets a visit from people he was sure wouldn’t come after him.

Late in the afternoon on another of those rare peaceful days, Luka decided to just lock himself in and play some more vidya.

“Furi looks so damn clean, man I’m about to look up a torrent right now-“ He stops muttering to himself when he hears his doorknob being rattled about viciously, he turns to see the latch unlocking itself. The door swings open to reveal who the mysterious lockpicker is. It’s... Anna. “Who the fuck?” 

Anna holds a gun, a real gun from his world, up at him. “Where’s my goddamn M O N E Y ?” She asks. 

Luka notices the jacket she’s wearing, it’s embroidered with the Steam logo. He blinks. “I paid y’all 17 cents, I sold all my CSGO items to give you as much as I could to apologize.” 

“You didn’t think we would come back for the BREAD?” The Anna insults. “I see you playing SUPERHOT... And The Silver Case? What’ve you been doing to pay for all that?”

“L O O K.” Luka begins, interrupting her, “I just dropped all this gold on orbs to get Grima, shit, I might cash out to get Leif-“

“Alright, we gave you WAY too many chances to pay this off.” 

“You know what.” Luka’s eyes gain obligatory meme lens flares. “Yaint, gonna come in my Castle, and start chattin that S H I T.”

“Alright.” Anna sighs. “I’ve had enough of this... If Steam don’t get to you, Imma get to you.” She says flatly, raising the gun.

“You ain’t gonna get to shit-“

“Excuse me? Luka?” Just in time, Alfonse makes his way into the room with them, holding a pale full of gold pieces. “The villagers paid us a hefty sum for liberating the village from Muspell, I said they didn’t have to but they insisted, where are we keeping our war funds?” Anna’s eyes immediately drift toward the gold in question. “I have, as you would put it... H E L L A B R E A D.”

Anna immediately holsters her pistol and grabs the bucket of gold, dashing off, Alfonse and Luka just watch. 

“...” Alfonse is speechless. “That didn’t seem like our commander, who was that?”

“She just took off with that money.” Luka states. “My fault for pirating all these games.”

“Er... Alright, I guess.” Alfonse says, walking out and closing the door.

“Gabe Newell got connections I see.” The summoner laughs, going back to his game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RAqkDfURh-I   
> Based off of this video


	8. Fated Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cheesy crackship that I want to be bigger than big, dammit. They’re perfect for eachother.

“I don’t believe in Fate.” He says, with a little bit of disdain. “Fate can change, I’ve seen that with my own eyes, so if that is all, then there’s no need for you to worry about me.” Corrin turns to leave, but the noble stops feeling a hand grasp his sleeve.

“You... You must reconsider...” The one who’d been talking to him says. “You’re right, Fate is a fragile thing, but it is what it is, stray from your path or... It’s as I said, you’ll be hurt.” Sophia grips tighter.

“Why does that concern you so much?” There’s a hint of a scoff, Corrin was a little sick of this mage he’d never once met clinging to him and telling him that if he goes up against Surtr he will die, all Corrin knew was that Surtr was a dictator much like Garon, their fight was fated... And yet... Here was Sophia, begging him not to. “Now stop following me, I’ve business to attend to!” He says, managing to shake her off.

Sophia curses the gods for making him so stubborn.

———

“I’m sorry.” He whispers.

“Sorry for... What...?” She nervously responds.

“Doubting you, and getting angry... It’s unlike me.” Corrin admits. Surtr had shown himself in their last battle, and as Corrin had promised, he challenged the conjurer of flame, a mistake on his part. He was utterly outmatched. Had it not been for Sophia’s warning, Corrin wouldn’t have retreated. Afterwards, he knew he’d want to stick around the half dragon more.

“It’s quite fine, lord Corrin.” Sophia says with a smile. Corrin can’t seem to pinpoint what’s making her so nervous, but he’s glad to see it isn’t him. “My visions have been hazier since arriving here, but all of a sudden, they became so... vivid... I knew I had to warn you... Thank you for listening, I don’t know what I would’ve done to myself had you perished.” 

Corrin’s smile diminishes. Silence washes over the library of the castle they’d taken shelter in. The more he looks at her, the more distraught his expression, prompting Sophia to tilt her head. “Are you well, milord?”

“J-just Corrin is fine!” He blurts out, startling the girl. “I’m sorry, really it’s just... You’re not the first I’ve met to be gifted with foresight.” Sophia gives a curious hum at that. “My... My mother, she allegedly was able to see visions of the future. Even...” His breath becomes heavy.

Sophia nods. “I see... I’m bringing back bad memories, if you wish for me to leave you be, then that is f-fine, lord- I mean, Corrin...” Sophia turns to leave, but the mage stops, feeling a hand grasp her sleeve.

“I didn’t mean it like that, don’t go... I only wanted to say...” Sophia turns back to the full blooded dragon’s gaze. “If you foresee your own death, do everything you can to avert it, and make sure I know so that I can help you do so...” He states, staring into her eyes, still holding onto her. He breaks their eye contact looking down sadly. “It’s only fair, a-after what you did for me.”

Sophia understood, not wishing to press further on the topic of Mikoto’s death, nodding. “I promise I’ll do that, as soon as it happens.” She holds onto him as he holds onto her. “I promise.”

He’d made a promise too, to protect Sophia to the best of his ability.

———

They fall in love fast, but they realize it so much later. 

Sophia sees visions of them together, protecting eachother in battle, keeping eachother happy, only they aren’t visions of the future. For they are visions in sleep, only dreams. She knew the circumstances, he was a prince from another world entirely, their love was not to be.

Corrin constantly makes sure she’s okay, insists on Luka placing him in patrols with her, considers her family. But that can only fill a small portion of the hole in his heart burning. He knew the circumstances, she was a prophet from another world entirely, their love was not to be.

Nonetheless they loved to listen to eachother go on and on about every little thing.

They talk about their heritages as dragons. Sophia does carry an appetite fitting of one. They learn together that although she can’t transform, a dragonstone can enhance Sophia’s magical capabilities. Corrin sometimes takes her flying, he can’t really fly, he simply jumps from a high place and uses his wings to glide.

They talk about their homes. Corrin knows he’d likely find the sands of Nabata unappealing but can’t help but feel that it’d be so much more peaceful than his own realm. Sophia can easily visualize the beautiful lands of Hoshido, the dark but interesting cities of Nohr, and the twisted geometries of Valla.

They both want to go home, but don’t want to lose eachother.

That was when he couldn’t take it any longer.

“You sent for me, lord, er... Corrin?” She seemed nervous, Sophia had been summoned to the Askran castle’s garden by Jakob, they were alone here.

“Yes, Sophia, please sit down.” He says with a reassuring smile. She does so, they sit and make small talk for a few minutes, but they both know they’re here for something. Sophia doesn’t know what it is, and Corrin isn’t sure he can go through with it. They look away from one another, towards the skies. “...I love you.” He whispers, just enough for Sophia to hear.

She shouldn’t be surprised, but she is. “Corrin... I love you too, never doubt that, but... Why?” She asks, voice trembling more. “You’re surrounded by much better people daily, and we could be separated at any moment when we have to leave for home...”

“I don’t believe in fate, I told you this once already.” He whispers. “If I’m not supposed to love you by Fate, then Fate can take it up with me personally. But as it stands, there’s nobody I see more beautiful, and nobody I see more kind to me. You just... Mean so much... Please, don’t worry about the future, I want to help you with it forever, I will stay with you when this war ends.” With that, the prince takes her palm and plants a kiss to the back of her hand.

“I... I see, then, it is alright. I don’t want you to leave me, okay? I think you’ve been the kindest to me out of everyone here, there’s nobody I’d rather spend my days with...” Sophia says, finally dropping her apprehensiveness. She reinforces her confession with a bold kiss to Corrin’s cheek. The dragon before her immediately blushes.

“I didn’t expect you to be bolder than I...”

“I feel okay being bold around you...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the dynamic of these two, especially as Sophia has the power of foresight. I’m busy but I definitely wanna write more of them. Both happy together and tragic shit. I’m just confused as to why nobody has thought of this ship.


	9. Let Us Obtain “It”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alfonse is fearing his first battle of the Spring Festival Tournament. Luka suggests a motivational phrase to get him ready.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry

“I refuse, I’m tired of being embarrassed like this!” Alfonse whines. “I’m in a bunny suit, fighting in a tournament where my own people and father can see me, and you want me to use a catchphrase?”

“Alfonse please just say it one time. I’m begging here.”

The prince shakes his head, disgusted by such a proposal, the summoner may have rather odd humor tastes but this was too far. “Why do you even want me to do this? It’s a dumb word!” He asks, now sounding more like a brat than a proper prince.

“Because I can see that you’re nervous, it’s supposed to fire you up!”

“It am not!”

“Are to.”

As much as Alfonse cherished their friend, he didn’t enjoy how terribly improper he felt like being when near Luka. He lets out a chuckle. “So, I’ve already gone this far... Might as well go the whole way.”

“Say the words, Alfonse, you must feel powerful when you say them.”

Alfonse takes a deep breath.

“Es... ketit...” He grabs his weapon, a very large spoon that would have to best a very sharp carrot.

“Louder, Alfonse.”

“...Esketit.” He mounts his horse, ready for combat.

“When you feel powerless in that costume you hate so much? I want you to forget your worries and just yell THAT WORD. It’s a word of empowerment. Battlecries such as these carried legendary warriors like Rocky Balboa to victory in my world.” The summoner elaborates, not caring to mention that Rocky was fiction. “Know that I believe in you, now get out there, and LET US GET IT!”

“Yeah! Esketit!” Alfonse shouts triumphantly, successfully suckered into another forced meme against his will.

“ESKETIT!” His partner yells in kind as the gates to the arena open, signaling the coming battle against prince Xander.

“E S K E T I T !” Alfonse repeats, headed to clash unreliable weapons with his rival.

That battlecry would carry him to a steady victory against his opponent.

Afterwards, Luka informed Alfonse of the origins of the legendary “Esketit.”

Alfonse was not pleased, Luka ended up cleaning the stables for the rest of the week, if you asked him if it was worth it he would nod his head and laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when I said I was sorry?  
> I lied. I LIED. I L I E D.  
> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
> Send me to meme hell where I belong.


	10. Heroes Are a Thing of The Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Good and The Ugly team up to take down The Bad...
> 
> Or rather, the western AU nobody asked for but everybody subconsciously wanted let’s be real here.

Alfonse sighs. He couldn’t believe he was doing this, but it was the only way he figured he could do such a thing with how protective his father was of him. After all, what good was a ranger that sat back and didn’t go after any criminals? He walks into the makeshift interrogation room, muttering orders to the officers overseeing to leave the room. The officers obey, leaving the captain’s son and a tied up young man in a white and gold poncho to stare at eachother, for the one outlaw Alfonse had caught was one of few words, and fewer crimes.

Alfonse’s father wanted only for the boy to be safe, but the boy was restless. So what better idea than to send him after a pacifistic bank robber known as “The Frigid Caper.” Though not a painful or deadly journey, Alfonse found capturing this one quite challenging, on account of a very interesting technique involving bullets filled with water, and maybe magic, he doesn’t know, he hasn’t had the time to ask, he does now.

“I’ll start with the elephant in the room,” Alfonse begins, “as I’ve experienced, you’re able to fire bullets that freeze on impact. How is this done exactly?” The handcuffed boy being questioned averts the ranger's gaze immediately at the mention of his ability. Alfonse sighs, placing a hand on the table. “How about an easier question? Are you a mute...?”

“Yes.” He says, looking up again with a mischievous grin.

“A comedian too, I see... Will you please answer my last question?” 

“It’s not so simple, and I’m not even sure how, it’s a long story, and a downer at that. So, I don’t think I want to tell you.” The stranger once again looks away. “So go ahead and throw me in jail now, you’re the son of the big shot who runs the law, right? I’m sure he’d be proud of you, even if your report doesn’t have all the info.”

Alfonse takes a sigh, disregarding the fact that he’s somehow been seen right through. “Well, I will need your name for the report. What is it?”

“Let's say, Kiran, yeah... I think that name sounds nice, don’t you agree?” The outlaw now known as Kiran says.

“...I’d ask for your real name, but we have wasted enough time.” Alfonse once again cannot believe he’s resorting to this. He takes the key to Kiran's handcuffs out of his pocket, undoing the lock. 

“...You and I duked it out for a whole hour, you’re finally able to tie me down, and now after all that you’re just letting me walk?” Kiran smirks. “I could tell you were a softie, but this is more than I’d expected.” 

“Oh, please.” Alfonse corrects him, “I’m not letting you go, I need your help. Tell me, have you ever heard of anyone with abilities similar to yours as of late?” He gives Kiran time to ponder, but he shakes his head signaling that nothing came to mind. “Well, I have... My father has been quite stressed dealing with a violent gang of arsons, the Múspell Mutilators... From the few interrogations I’ve overheard of those who’ve survived their attacks, their leader is said to wield flame, like magic. So, why not fight fire with fire? Magic gunslinger against magic gunslinger, Fire VS Ice.” 

Kiran nods his head. “That is a pretty sound plan... But I’m willing to bet you haven’t told anyone else about it, am I right about that too?”

Alfonse takes a breath. “This is my chance to show people what I’m capable of, and your chance to stay out of jail. We should both take our chances right away.”

“That’s what I like to hear. So, is this the part where you put the handcuffs back onto me, make a comment about escorting me to a proper prison, and then we go rogue road trip after this gang?”

“I believe this is that part.” Alfonse smiles.

Thus began a wild journey, and an unrivaled partnership.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full AU coming never lmao
> 
> Okay maybe
> 
> Probably 
> 
> I had lots of fun writing this okay
> 
> Magic western is an awesome concept but I could never do it as much justice as JoJo part 7 did.


	11. Update

Hey all, finals week is just an hour away from being over, as well as school in general for me. But I’ve got kind of an issue.

I’m running out of ideas for fun scenarios to write for this series! 

I guess this is a side effect of being wrapped up in my actual series, Fire Emblem Fates: B Sides ~~(If you like Retrofuture aesthetic, old school Nintendo stuff, homestuck style writing, and Fates in general, you should definitely read that.)~~ please ignore the shameless self advertisement. Unless you don’t want to, then indulge away.

But my misfortune is a prize for you, now you get to tell me what dumb stuff to write!

There will be a few guidelines, however, of course.

If I haven’t played the game with the characters or concepts you wish to have written about, I’m not gonna take the requests. That said, I’ve played every game in the series except for New Mystery, Thracia 776, and the Tellius Games. (I swear I’m finishing the whole series over the summer gimme time lads)

I won’t write explicit sexual content, no exceptions.

I will write shitposts. Meme hell is where I belong.

I’m also a crackship connoisseur, so gimme your best ones.

That’s really about it? Not much to it. All requests should take place within the Heroes setting, but I will use characters who aren’t in Heroes atm. Gimme ideas and maybe I’ll write them.


End file.
